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My War

Every night I wage a war. I battle with whatever prevents me from sleep. I don’t know what it is, but I hate it. I spend all day tired, wishing for sleep. Then I lay down at night and wait for sleep to take me, but it never does. I shouldn’t say never, but it feels that way!
I go to bed around midnight but it usually takes hours to be out. I lay on bed and think. I think of nothing in particular. I think of my day, of work, of tv, of memories, of goofy things….the list goes on and on. I’ve tried counting sheep, but after a few thousand, even that gets boring.
I take Tylenol PM, I take my antidepressant, I attempt to relax. The Tylenol worked for a few weeks but I think I’ve built up a resistance. I don’t want to take a bunch of the pills because I’m afraid they will work too well. I don’t want to take a Heath Ledger nap (horrible joke!).
I’m seriously running out of options. I hate fighting sleep. It’s so exhausting. That, and it makes me a prick the rest of the day. So, my question is: how do you fall asleep? Any tips or tricks you use? Any advice would be appreciated!


One response to “My War

  1. Pat Storm ⋅

    I think I’ve told you this before, Josh. I hope you will try it. I count my blessings and it’s never failed to put me to sleep. I usually start out with how blessed I am to have a bed to lie in, blankets and pillows to keep me warm and comfortable, a roof over my head, a house with electrcity and running water and indoor plumbing, that I have a refrigerator full of food and the means to buy what I need, that I can see, hear, taste, feel, smell. If I’m in pain I thank God for the pain for some people do not feel pain and are constantly injured because of it. If I am missing loved ones, I think God for their lives and for letting me be a part of it. If I am sick (and I’ve been sick for 8 days now), I thank God for good health and ask Him to forgive me for taking it for granted. If I’m sick of my job or stressed out because of it, I thank God that I have a job because there are so many who are jobless. You get the idea. It’s always worked for me. I hope it will work for you.

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