Chapter 5- Mens Room Etiquette
Few things bother me more than the things that go on in the Mens Room. It’s a shame that this blog needs to be written. Most if this is common sense. It’s crazy that people don’t understand this!
– Don’t stand next to another guy at the urinal. If there are 3+ urinals in said Mens Room never use the middle. You should go to the far left one or the far right. If you’re using the middle urinal you throw it all off for the rest of us. I’d rather use a stall than stand next to you.
– Keep your eyes forward while peeing! Pick a spot on the wall and stay right there. Never look left or right, stay focused on your ‘spot’. I don’t want some Pecker Checker standing near me while I’m taking care of business. That’s a private place that you have no business with.
– Shut up. Very simple. No one wants to talk to you while they are holding their Johnson. This is even more important while at a store. If an employee is peeing don’t talk to them. I was once peeing when so guy tapes on the shoulder to ask where something is. Seriously!?! Piss off! This is not a time for customer service. I’m never going to answer you!
– Keep your hands to yourself. (please see previous entry)
– Guys, don’t bring your young daughters into the bathroom while you poop! It’s hard to pee when some little girl is watching you. Hold it until you get home.
– Don’t play cell phone games when you are pooping. It’s weird.
– Wash your hands. I don’t know how many times I’ve seen people leave without washing. Gross. I don’t even want to touch the door handle after you’ve been handling your meat!
That’s pretty much it for this chapter. Feel free to add to my list of bathroom ‘rules’. I can not be the only guy who has thought about this.